tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-45440857493262501382024-02-20T02:41:18.407-05:00Sit. Write. Bleed. The Official Blog of Jay RequardA site dedicated to work of Jay Requard, a Sword & Sorcery author.Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-19944243466469148512017-10-23T11:06:00.001-04:002017-10-23T11:11:43.183-04:00Save Yourself: A #HoldOnToTheLight Post<div class="MsoNormal">
My life recently has been plagued by instances of mental
illness—both my own and exposures to others.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Since my original post for #HoldOnToTheLight, <a href="http://sitwritebleed.blogspot.com/2016/10/hold-onto-the-light.html" target="_blank">“Life afterFighting, Fighting for Life”</a>, the revelation of how utterly alone <i>I’m not</i> has been at points enlightening,
stressful, a few times horrific, and often downright quirky. I
don’t think everyone around me is mentally ill, but it’s given me pause to coping
behaviors people use to get on, get through, and get past whatever is in front
of them.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m happy to report that I find more people
meeting negativity with positive habits that make far better arguments for working
against your demons instead of for them, but there are also a lot of people
that are angry—they are angry because of the economy, the president, or this
issue, or that issue, or my issues, but every time we complain we all share one thing in common:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We’re all suffering and we don’t want to be, and the vast
majority of us don’t want others to suffer either. Some are clearly suffering
worse, but on the whole, many of the human beings around the world are not
having a great time being a part of it.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
During the summer I moved to Colorado after living
almost ten years in Charlotte, North Carolina, and like the Queen City, the
homeless situation here is AMAZINGLY BAD. Most people living on the streets are
former veterans, the elderly, opioid addicts and alcoholics, and those who have
fallen through the system. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The vast majority of them are mentally ill. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
They harm themselves, scream in the street at 2:00 AM, and
cluster together on sidewalks where they suffer openly and alone, trapped in
private hells while shuffling through some of the most beautiful neighborhoods
I’ve ever lived in. They aren’t bothering you, they don’t have cellphones, and
they aren’t burnt-out hippies or college kids begging for change—these people are lost.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Thankfully Denver provides a wonderful network of homeless
shelters and public services that make sure these people have places to sleep
in the winter, food in their stomachs, and the local community comes together
every weekend for fresh blankets and clothes, mobile showers, haircuts, and job
drives. For all the bad things that happen in the world, there are real heroes
out there doing their best to help—because they show up.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Seeing the struggle of mental illness every day when I go
outside has been a fascinating mirror to examine my own coping mechanisms (or
lack thereof) in a time when I’m dealing with my own challenges—but I keep in mind
that people keeping showing up.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Some background: I was diagnosed with clinical depression as a teenager and
that depression was compounded by a series of concussions and bad habits that
led to a PTSD-diagnosis, which I’ve thankfully done pretty well getting past by
getting better, but it took years of therapy for me to finally figure out the
right habits needed for me to get past these things—and thankfully, those
skills worked. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Meditation, exercise, a better diet, and having people and
professionals to talk to allowed me a solid foundation to better deal with my
conditions in a multitude of different ways, which sometimes feels like
demolishing a house to rebuild the foundation, but sometimes that is needed. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yet the most
important thing was that people showed up to save me first. From friends to family to
my psychologist, even strangers offered help and advice in times of need.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And yet, even having experienced that, I had no clue I was going
to have to deal with anxiety when it finally got around to be named for what it
was. In some ways I’ve always been anxious, but it’s always been
about process. One of the coping mechanisms I developed for depression—putting
my nose to the grindstone and getting the work done so I can be satisfied that
I at least put in effort—developed a downside: I would place all the little
things that would cause me to be depressed or anxious to the side until they
crowded in, and when they crowded in, I didn’t just trip over them as much as I
let them drive me into closets and sit in empty hotel restaurants crying while
my friends crowed in the bar a hundred feet from me.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So now I have to work more, which is exhausting but
worthwhile. Along with my work and my work at Falstaff Books, being a husband,
trying to be healthier and happier, there were already challenges along with
these blessings. My boss wants me to learn that it is okay to ask for help,
something that I struggle with. I deal with bouts of insomnia, but I now make
time to sleep when I can instead of “soldiering on,” striving every day to
handle both anxiety and depression. Some of it is doing the stuff I was doing
before: meditation, healthier eating habits, exercise, and staying active in my
own life by being mindful—but now I also have to teach myself to take a step
back from anxiety like I step back from the depression and figure out how to
work around both, and sometimes those internal processes conflict. It’s not easy, but it’s not impossible either.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But people are still showing up.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
From my wife to my best friend/boss, or my coworkers at
Falstaff Books, and even some digital therapy sessions, people have come out of
the woodwork to help me learn how to better care for myself. Because of them
this is a challenge I can beat.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Now I know I speak of mental illness as a challenge, and I
realize that in that challenge I have a sense of privilege. I tackled and beat
my depression before, so I know I can beat my anxiety. This is a challenge I
relish, but I know so, so many who do not feel or see it that way. Some people
after they read this are still going to feel alone, or worthless, or one of the
many little lies our illnesses allow us to create for ourselves.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Those people will still be by themselves. Therein lies the root of the problem.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’ve put in a lot of work to save myself from myself because
people first showed up to save me, and for all the back patting I can’t forget
that I was once that kid with a chain around his neck who thought no one cared about him. I beat that, but like I
said the last time we were here, I know too many stories of those that didn’t
get to win their struggle.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The need to save ourselves is paramount, and not so we can
pat ourselves on the back, or “grow past” our problems—for many mental illness
is a life and death battle to the end, and while the cost of defeat is
exacting in its sorrow, the glory of victory is beyond anything a person can
win outside of themselves. I need to get better so one day I can say “I beat
anxiety and depression and saved myself. And so can you.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I need to save myself so I can show up for others.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Every victory, yours and mine, saves actual
lives.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If you are suffering, say something. There will be people
there to love you, take you in, armor you up, and go fight with you until one
day you too can say “I beat my mental illness. So can you.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Donate to local shelters for the poor and underprivileged,
help out with food drives, and volunteer. One of the things that I have
discovered on my journey is that offering help first is often the key to getting
things done. Sometimes s few hours
at the library volunteering or simply asking someone “how are you?” makes all
the difference in the world. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Speaking for myself, the worst part of about anxiety and
depression for me is yjsy loneliness—and having someone simply come to be with me or
acknowledge my existence breaks all that.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So go save yourself and show up for someone else. It will mean the world.<br />
<br />
About the campaign:<br />
<br />
#HoldOnToTheLight is a blog campaign encompassing blog posts by fantasy and science fiction authors around the world in an effort to raise awareness around treatment for depression, suicide prevention, domestic violence intervention, PTSD initiatives, bullying prevention and other mental health-related issues. We believe fandom should be supportive, welcoming and inclusive, in the long tradition of fandom taking care of its own. We encourage readers and fans to seek the help they or their loved ones need without shame or embarrassment.<br />
<br />
Please consider donating to or volunteering for organizations dedicated to treatment and prevention such as: American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, Hope for the Warriors (PTSD), National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Canadian Mental Health Association, MIND (UK), SANE (UK), BeyondBlue (Australia), To Write Love On Her Arms (TWLOHA) and the National Suicide Prevention Hotline.<br />
<br />
To find out more about #HoldOnToTheLight, find a list of participating authors and blog posts, or reach a media contact, go to <a href="http://www.holdontothelight.com/">http://www.HoldOnToTheLight.com</a> and join us on Facebook <a href="https://www.facebook.com/WeHoldOnToTheLight">https://www.facebook.com/WeHoldOnToTheLight</a><br />
<br />
Follow me <a href="http://twitter.com/jayrequard" target="_blank">@JayRequard</a>!<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<blockquote>
<blockquote>
</blockquote>
</blockquote>
</blockquote>
</blockquote>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-77460746571377404852017-05-14T15:18:00.000-04:002017-05-14T15:18:09.373-04:00The Mossed Edges aka "Fangorn" by Jay RequardA lot of stuff is happening with the blog, which is the reason it hasn't been updated. More on that when there is something to speak of. However, I'm back to writing weird fantasy poetry!<br />
<br />
Enjoy?<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
The Moss Edges aka "Fangorn"<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
By Jay Requard<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://orig06.deviantart.net/76c7/f/2008/028/f/0/f07bb7567b3f68be.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="250" src="https://orig06.deviantart.net/76c7/f/2008/028/f/0/f07bb7567b3f68be.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Fangorn Forest by <a href="http://isidora.deviantart.com/" target="_blank">Isidora</a></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Northern symphonies sink within high-mind joys,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
racing the green strip to stars set at sun’s tide,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
endless, and endless, and endless…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I slither like the skywalkers, a shivering serpent,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
smoky songs low in my throat while shadows shift,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
forever the shadows shift on…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Time.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Time halts at the edge of a white bank,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
the Ent’s hands grinding herbs between his bark.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He looks up from the lump he makes,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
wondering how much time he wastes by the stream.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Far off the wanderer presses through the forest,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
a bowl burning in his lips,<o:p></o:p></div>
knowing that stars lie ahead on the other side.<br /><br /><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><a href="http://sitwritebleed.blogspot.com/p/publications.html" target="_blank">Check out my books.</a></span>Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-44113580108325714072016-10-15T18:15:00.000-04:002017-07-17T10:36:58.618-04:00Life After Fighting, Fighting for Life: a #HoldOntoTheLight postI will start with a declarative statement:<br />
<br />
After 30 years of life on this planet I am still alive.<br />
<br />
This statement contains a story within itself, but it is far harder for me not to remember the other stories I've grown up with.<br />
<br />
My first cousin committed suicide when I was thirteen. Nobody knew he was depressed, save for a recent breakup, and nobody believed he had those thoughts until it happened.<br />
<br />
In sixth grade I was awed by the news that an older boy, an eighth grader, had gone home and hung himself during the day. Another friend's brother shot himself in the head.<br />
<br />
Then I got into high school and things got very real. From a significant someone who tried to snort her way to destiny to a very gentle girl that carved the inside of her legs with a needle because she felt awful about herself, unspoken problems involving mental illness ran amok. Her older sister, who had been a very talented writer from what I remember, scratched the inside of her arms with needles too. People were cutting but nobody wanted to talk about it--save for the few brave parents who tackled these things head on and, surprisingly, often caught flack for having the courage to actually do something instead of sweeping it under the rug. Some of those people were and remain as close to me as family.<br />
<br />
Mental illness is an epidemic our society refused to even acknowledge for a long time, but for many of the communities I grew up in it was lingering specter above us all, an malefic spirit that always threatened to take another without warning.<br />
<br />
Into my junior year of high school I had a friend who was addicted to heroin. His best friend, the dude that started shoving way too many heavy metal CD's into my hands, literally watched out for my-friend-the-junkie day and night. My peer group spent weekends drinking pretty hard and living very fast. It is not out of the way to remember how many people I knew that felt left out of things, how people floated in and out of their self-destructive packs, and how many who were simply lost.<br />
<br />
Sure, these are often the stories about growing up, but it was always startling to see how many of those stories were haunted by mental illness.<br />
<br />
Some of us (see: Jay) had real anger issues, others tough family situations, and there were a lot of kids and adults I knew that were strung out or pilled up on something. The last of the Gen-Xers, who I looked up to, struggled with their place in the world after college and a few were left behind when it broke them. Drugs were a constant reality. I probably smoked and drank too much myself to mute out the world, but so did a lot of athletes I ran with. From those on the high school wrestling team to the guys I rolled jiu-jitsu with in the strip malls, there were always problems with depression. Start adding concussions into the mix and guys would act very strange. One of my closer friends at the time lost his brother to suicide--a brother who was one of my little sister's closest friends.<br />
<br />
College was worse.<br />
<br />
Many of my friends were poor and struggling with un-diagnosed bipolar disorders, self-medicating to get through working and going to school full-time--and some of them were raising kids, which while wonderful was a colossal burden within itself. I met a mom who served bar and she was the nearest thing to Wonder Woman I've ever met. And she popped a lot of pills. A lot of people were on some form of a SSRI.<br />
<br />
And say what you want: The Bush Years were soul crushing. A lot of people went off to war and died. A lot of families were left with loved ones too damaged to make themselves a "normal" life when they came home. I knew a few soldiers that were taken by PTSD while I was in college. They aren't here to tell their stories now.<br />
<br />
Here is the point where I insert myself back into it and admit my own demons: Since the time I was 14 years old I had wanted something all through high school and the beginning of college--a career in mixed martial arts--and through injury and purely bad choices on my part I screwed myself out of that. It took a lot of therapy before that period of my life and lot of therapy and love after that period to come to terms with the reality that I couldn't have what I wanted anymore.<br />
<br />
That same reality almost took me twice and, if I'm purely honest, the same depression followed me into my destined career too. I know a good many writers in my community that really struggle with depression and suicide. I was, again, one of them not too long ago.<br />
<br />
Yet for my part in this, I still remember the stories of others:<br />
<br />
One roommate was so terribly broken by his experiences in the Bosnian-Serbian Conflict that he refused to act outside of a self-proscribed set of behaviors that inevitably led to self-mutilation and becoming one of the first people I know to be addicted to bath salts. The uncle who lost his son to suicide when I was thirteen went through rehab not too long ago. The fight to stay sober, happy, and healthy is a hard one for him that he faces every day.<br />
<br />
And there's the point: for people that struggle with mental illness, life is a fight, no matter if you are using your fists or not.<br />
<br />
I make the statement "I am still alive" to write stories because I know of how many stories were ended because of cruel circumstance, or addiction, or depression, or something even deeper. The only reason I'm here is because I did something we are sometimes shamed in society for doing: I went and found help. I went to therapist, tried medication, took up meditation, and still work every day to fight the specter of mental illness. My best friends do too.<br />
<br />
The best thing we can do to talk about mental illness is to tell these stories and let others know that somehow, somewhere, someone out there cares enough to help them. The more we talk about it the more we help others win their fight to hold on, endure, and find their own victories. It is a far better option than waiting until it is too late and having another tale lost.<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">About the campaign:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">#HoldOnToTheLight is a blog campaign encompassing
blog posts by fantasy and science fiction authors around the world in an effort
to raise awareness around treatment for depression, suicide prevention,
domestic violence intervention, PTSD initiatives, bullying prevention and other
mental health-related issues. We believe fandom should be supportive, welcoming
and inclusive, in the long tradition of fandom taking care of its own. We
encourage readers and fans to seek the help they or their loved ones need
without shame or embarrassment. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Please consider donating to or
volunteering for organizations dedicated to treatment and prevention such as: American
Foundation for Suicide Prevention, Hope for the Warriors (PTSD), National
Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Canadian Mental Health Association, MIND
(UK), SANE (UK), BeyondBlue (Australia), To Write Love On Her Arms (TWLOHA) and
the National Suicide Prevention Hotline.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">To find out more about #HoldOnToTheLight, find a
list of participating authors and blog posts, or reach a media contact, go to </span><span style="font-family: "calibri" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><a href="http://www.holdontothelight.com/"><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">http://www.HoldOnToTheLight.com</span></a></span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"> and join us on Facebook </span><span style="font-family: "calibri" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/WeHoldOnToTheLight"><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">https://www.facebook.com/WeHoldOnToTheLight</span></a></span>Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-2141047336226862002016-04-03T08:57:00.002-04:002016-04-03T08:57:34.343-04:00Green Dreams by Jay RequardAs you all know I sometimes post poems here because I know I'm not a poet, but in the tradition of my literary grandfather, J.R.R. Tolkien, though he was a master of the epic poem and his more folkloric ditties about Christmas and all that. I just have these things come to me and this one seemed good enough to share. It is in a free-form style.<br />
<br />
<b><u><i>Green Dreams </i>by Jay Requard</u></b><br />
<br />
Morning's first lucid light hearkens,<br />
elderitch memories sparked by the grass,<br />
where emerald scents mingle and fly,<br />
ghosts upon a fresh day's breath.<br />
<br />
Oh, how I've faltered,<br />
lost in the ever-shifting, ever-changing,<br />
cycle of Awen, where dreams hold fate<br />
and doubt forges the shadow.<br />
<br />
And yet a fresh day's breath,<br />
a moment of illumination,<br />
emeralds burn and become ghosts.<br />
I find the everlasting.<br />
<br />
Long lost is the shadow,<br />
sent far to travel and sow<br />
in the lands where green dreams grow<br />
and holies shine in other-light.<br />
<br />
<br />Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-89930320284364756612015-11-24T18:00:00.000-05:002015-11-24T18:19:47.722-05:00Six Things New Writers Can Learn In Six MonthsFor all the communal aspects publishing fosters, writing is still a solitary profession that requires its adherents to develop themselves as much as they develop their storytelling abilities. This can be difficult, as we are all victims of our own neuroses, hang-ups, and habits. For example: I have a big issue staying focused on one project, which often leaves me having to deal with three different manuscripts, and invariably, I will only focus on two of them. I'm working on this, but the thought came to me that there were six things to share that might help my fellow wordsmiths better commit themselves in a healthy, happy way. I would never dare to say that these are universal; they are just ideas, and like all ideas, they should only be considered if they add to your process.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<h4>
<span style="font-size: large;">1. MEDITATION</span></h4>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I first learned meditation from a physician my family patroned, named Dr. Z (I cannot remember nor spell his Russian last name). Like Dr. Z, meditation helped me with a lot of the anxiety that comes with people in a situation where people treat you like you are damaged. Meditation helped me later when I decided to dedicate myself to it in relation to my writing. I like to work fast, and I expect faster results, but unfortunately publishing is a slow, arduous process. Being able to slow down, clear your mind, and stop thinking is a pivotal skill both for writing and for life. We are flooded by our senses every moment we are awake and asleep, and with writing, it is multiplied. We become so ingrained within our characters, our stories, and we sometimes forget to take a step back. For me, meditation is that step back. Anyone can do it, and it only has as much of a spiritual component as you allow it, and you can do it as long as you like. It is an open practice.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
There are a lot of resources where you can learn meditation, but here's a simple introduction to the basic technique:<br />
<br />
Find a comfortable place to sit where you won't be bothered by noises or distractions. This could be your writing area (which for me is my entire apartment. I'm a bit nomadic.) Sit in comfortable position, using whatever you need to do so. <a href="http://www.dharmacrafts.com/100xZA/DharmaCrafts-Meditation-Supplies.html">I use a Zafu pillow.</a> Close your eyes, and empty your mind of all thoughts or, if you are very active, picture yourself in a setting. I usually go to a place like this:<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.visitscotland.com/cms-images/2x1/about/nature-geography/forests-woodlands/loch-trool" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.visitscotland.com/cms-images/2x1/about/nature-geography/forests-woodlands/loch-trool" height="160" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Count your breaths. In through your nose, out through your mouth. Nose In, Mouth Out, Nose In, Mouth Out. In the beginning, try to get at least 15 good breaths before you open your eyes. This will calm you down, and in time, help you see the world and your work more objectively, as well as your writing. Which leads us to...</div>
<h4 style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></h4>
<h4 style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="font-size: large;">2. YOUR WORK IS NOT YOU (EVEN THOUGH IT IS)</span></h4>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
One issue that really plagues me is separating myself from my work, often taking criticism more harshly than I should, and in some ways, delivering it. First, no writer or reader should criticize another for who they are, but it is completely fine to constructively criticize the work, even if it is as simple as "it's not for me." Learning to separate these two things is incredibly important.<br />
<br />
Now, this idea is a bit of misnomer. Of course your work is about you--you wrote it, and whatever you write, it is a reflection of how you feel, your experiences, and your beliefs at the time of the writing. Still, it is important to remove "you" from assessing the quality of what you put out. As I have said before, <a href="http://sitwritebleed.blogspot.com/2013/03/dealing-with-critiques-and-rejection.html">rejections can be a great thing for a writer</a> if they go about assessing why they were rejected in the right way.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Here's an exercise: next time you get a rejection, sit down with the rejected work and read it differently. Act like you are not the person who wrote the piece, but a constructive critic who has never read it. This will open you up to new details you might not have noticed in your previous proofreading, ways to better the story, etc. There is a multitude of wisdoms to gain in doing this.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h4>
<span style="font-size: large;">3. FINISH YOUR WORK</span></h4>
<br />
One would think that this would be a given for new writers, but every day I hear so many writers I come across lament their inability to finish a manuscript. Among the things I am speaking of here, this one might be greater in importance than the second point above, so let me clear:<br />
<br />
Finish your stories.<br />
<br />
So many people get into the Craft of Writing thinking that it will be a simple enough business to finish their first book, let alone a simple short story. The act of writing is arduous, being a combination of physical, mental, and emotional stress much like a real job. Sitting in a chair hurts me. I don't stop thinking about what I should be writing. I sometimes cry when I am done with a story. Putting in work is putting in work, and finishing a story gets you past a huge hurdle that the majority of writers never even attempt to leap. Finish your stories. It is the only way you can find out what you really need to work on.<br />
<br />
<br />
<h4>
<span style="font-size: large;">4. READ CRITICALLY FOR PLEASURE</span></h4>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
This one will take a bit of explanation.<br />
<br />
When one decides to become a writer, they often forget to remain a reader. However, things change quickly when one takes up the craft. Speaking for myself, getting involved in the process of writing initially made reading fiction a much more labor-intensive task. I often found myself breaking down the style of the writer I was reading, looking for imperfections I wanted to avoid in my own work. This can take a lot of fun out of the act of reading, but with a few little tricks, it became a joy again.<br />
<br />
For all the mistakes you notice, take the time to bask in the moments where you are just reading. When there are no mistakes, the reader simply reads, and though we are writers, we will always be readers first. Mark the places you really enjoyed, and the places you did not. Read deeply for lessons, for theme, constructions, character, everything; reading critically can be a wonderful experience if you go about it the right way. Make it about learning first, criticism last.<br />
<br />
<h4>
<span style="font-size: large;">5. JOIN A GOOD WRITING GROUP</span></h4>
</div>
<div>
<br />
<a href="http://cltwriters.com/">Like this one.</a><br />
<h4>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></h4>
<h4>
<span style="font-size: large;">6. UNDERSTAND THAT PUBLISHING IS NOT A ZERO-SUM GAME... but The Craft is competitive.</span></h4>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
It is easy to think that the publishing industry would be a competitive place as a new writer, but if you look beneath the surface, it is anything but. Here's what you need to understand: everyone around you wants everyone else to succeed (unless you make a colossal ass of yourself, which I am sometimes guilty of), and this is because we're working for the most wonderful resource there is in the world: readers. Readers like to read, so they aren't going to buy just YOUR book (if they do in the first place, which is another blogpost for another blog time.) They will keep buying the product we put out, all because readers are so wonderfully voracious.<br />
<br />
At the same time, I think it is important for writers to have a bit of an competitive bent. This is just an opinion I hold to myself, but I want to write better than<a href="http://www.rasalvatore.com/" target="_blank"> R.A. Salvatore</a>, my literary hero. I want to write better than <a href="http://www.jeffvandermeer.com/" target="_blank">Jeff Vandermeer</a>, the baddest MFer in Fiction today. I want to write better than <a href="http://www.kvj.ca/blackdog/" target="_blank">K.V. Johansen</a>, one of the most talented writers I have ever seen in Epic Fantasy. I want to write better than any other luminary I can name. I think every writer should look at their inspirations in absolute reverence, but also as bars you need to climb over. <a href="http://www.pernhome.com/aim/" target="_blank">Anne McCaffery</a> set bars. <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Lloyd-Alexander/e/B000AQ1QXY" target="_blank">Lloyd Alexander</a> set bars. <a href="http://www.tolkiensociety.org/" target="_blank">Tolkien</a>, my literary father, set bars. <a href="http://www.gemmellaward.com/page/david-gemmell-chronological-order" target="_blank">David Gemmell</a>. <a href="http://www.multiverse.org/" target="_blank">Michael Moorcock</a>. <a href="http://www.crossplains.com/howard/" target="_blank">Robert E. Howard</a>. Try to achieve more than your forefathers and foremothers did. We owe it to them.<br />
<br />
These are practices, attitudes, and mindsets you can achieve as a writer in six months. They have been invaluable to my creative process over the years, and if they can add to yours, I hope you produce some of your best work.<br />
<br />
So let's get to work.<br />
<br />
Thank you for stopping. Please feel free to check out my Publications page and follow me on Twitter @JayRequard if you enjoy the content you find on this blog. In addition, if you really do enjoy the content on this blog, please consider clicking on the G+1 button on the left of the page. It lets me know that the content I am creating is meaningful, and it is at no cost to you.<br />
<br />
Stay safe and see you soon!</div>
Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-4729480134114006272015-11-17T08:17:00.000-05:002015-11-17T08:17:12.165-05:00Evaluating Critiques: Do's and Don'ts to FollowFull disclosure: I am writing this out of reaction to a bad critique session I recently experienced, but instead of sitting and stewing on the negatives, the decision was made to turn that experience into a positive one. <br />
<br />
Critiquing fiction, short or long, is often dependant on the critiquers themselves being well-read, experienced in collaborating with an editor (which means they have sold work), and taking the time to go out and get training through workshops, at conventions, and even within the critique groups themselves. Good writers are good critiquers because they put the work into their writing, reading, and editing on a daily basis so they can learn the tricks of producing great fiction. Still, there are pitfalls that can plague any critique group. The list below is a series of four Do's and Don'ts when it comes to giving and receiving a critique.<br />
<br />
<h2>
<u>JAY's List of Four DOs and DON'Ts: Critiquing Fiction</u></h2>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
<br /></h3>
<h3>
DO read the work more than once</h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
As the current Head Organize of <a href="http://cltwriters.com/" target="_blank">Charlotte Writers </a>and as a regular member of some smaller groups beforehand, I can easily say that since 2011 I have read hundreds, if not thousands of pages of manuscript. Everything from my genre of Fantasy, to Science Fiction, to Romance, to Memoir, and even manuscripts that contain poems have passed in front of me, and one of the first things I learned that I needed to do was read a manuscript more than once. I discovered the need to do this the hard way during one critique session where I had read a Charlotte Writer member's manuscript more than a week before their scheduled critique, where the entire membership would discuss the work while the writer remained silent (which is always wonderful in terms of learning body language), and it couldn't have gone worse for me. I forgot key points to the story's plot, characters, everything you could imagine, and in the end I was unable to offer anything of value to the person who had put so much time and effort into their manuscript.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
The solution I came up with was to read the manuscripts twice (we usually critique two during a session): once when they first became available for download, and then again on Friday, at which point I would actually start creating my notes that I would explain during the session itself. This way I was always prepared, was familiar with the work, but at the same time, reading the work twice allowed me to learn new things about the author in terms of their style of writing, what they did right, and what mistakes they made that I want to avoid, etc.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Putting in this kind of time can offer huge dividends; both for yourself and for them!</div>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
<br /></h3>
<h3>
DON'T critique the author; critique the work!</h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
This is a faux-paus that happens more often than not because it is an easy one to make. Writing, especially fiction writing, is a reflection of the writer's very self, and from reading their work in a critical setting can often leave critiquers open to interpret things about the writer that may or may not be true.<br />
<br />
For example: I was once leading a critique of a writer whose work featured the kidnapping and very graphic rape of a young woman, two things in today's publishing industry is looked at with less than favorable views, both by professionals and readers (which I agree with, by the by.) As soon as comments were allowed to be taken, the author was hit with "Your creepy prose..", "Your sick...", etc., and it created an atmosphere where everyone had to tiptoe around what they said about the work because they were making value judgements on the person. When the author of the work was finally allowed to address the comments made, they revealed they had written the creepy character in question because it was told by that character's POV. Once it was explained, it made far more sense, yet the damage was still done--critiquers had made judgements on the person AS WELL as their work, and the author stopped attending our group. <br />
<br />
Part of the fault for that was mine, and after that day, I made sure that it was the work being critiqued, not the author! Judge their work for what the work is, not as a measuring stick for who they are. What they are there for is constructive criticism of their writing and NOTHING ELSE. (However, it should be said that we do not allow works at Charlotte Writers that contain bigotry or misogyny as positive affectations of a work.)<br />
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
<br /></h3>
<h3>
DO be clear about your expectations</h3>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Often when I host Charlotte Writers critique sessions, we often ask our writers who submit work for critique to be clear as they can be about what they are looking for. Are the characters likeable? Does the pace work with the genre? Is the dialogue engaging? These are all wonderful questions to ask and receive information on, but it is equally important that you as the critiquer are also clear about your own expectations. There are some definite questions you have to answer when you go into a critique:<br /><br />1. What are you looking for as a reader? Are you looking for clean copy? Grammar issues? Flow and pacing? Content that speaks to you? You have to answer these questions because not every critiquer is great at everything, nor are they supposed to be. Some of them are better at writing characters than they are writing plot, just like some are stellar at dialogue but really need to learn how to write action scenes. You have to know what you expect from the submission.<br />
<br />
2. Is the work publishable for its market? This is one of the bigger concerns I try to bring to Charlotte Writers when we critique submitted work, as the stated goal of the organization is to prepare writers to get their work published in the genre marketplace. This often requires our members to put in time by learning about the industry at conventions, conferences, meet-ups, workshops, etc. You have to know the business you want to be in, and you have to know the current conventions by which the publishing business works. It not only helps you with your own manuscripts, but it also assists in allowing you to look at a manuscript from another author and point out the places that would get them sent to the rejection pile.<br />
<h3>
<br /></h3>
<h3>
DON'T GIVE/RECEIVE A CRITIQUE IF YOU'RE NOT READY!</h3>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Let's be honest: critiquing is hard. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
A lot of factors are involved when it comes to a reader enjoying your work, and sometimes no matter what you write, it won't be right for them--and they may be highly critical of that, but that is what they are there for. I cannot tell you how many times a new writer has come up to me and expressed their fear about getting critiqued, and what I usually tell them is that the first time is always nerve-wracking, but if you can get through it will probably never be nerve-wracking again. It's like pulling off a band-aid.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
However, just because you are ready to have your work critiqued doesn't mean *you* are ready for the process. It takes a lot of humility and maturity to sit there and let someone put your "Literary Baby" in a corner, and if you are going through a tumultuous time this can be really trying. There have been instances at critique sessions where prospective authors state that they are ready and then fall apart by the end. I have seen tears, passive aggressive responses, and the always aggravating defense of things everyone else found issues with. If twenty readers in the room find something in error with your manuscript, most likely the problem is there, and the best thing you can do with it is take the time to really look at what was said about the issue. Writing is a process of creation and problem-solving, and denial does nothing to solve problems. The best thing you can do is be ready.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
To sum up, critiquing is a wonderful way to grow your skills as a writer, but a lot of thought needs to be put into the process just like every other aspect of your work. Be humble, keep your ears and mind open, and remember that this is about identifying problems and solving them. If you can keep yourself motivated enough to fix those problems, you're well on way to the day you sell a story, a novel, or whatever. Be mindful of your own expectations and knowledgable about what you and others write. In doing so you will grow by leaps and bounds.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Critiques are a powerful tool. If you learn to use this tool correctly, you will become a powerful writer.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Thank you for dropping by. Please check out my <a href="http://sitwritebleed.blogspot.com/p/publications.html" target="_blank">Publications</a>, and please consider clicking on the G+1 button on the left side of the screen if you enjoy the content you see here on the blog. Follow me <a href="https://twitter.com/JayRequard" target="_blank">@JayRequard</a> on Twitter, and see you next time! </div>
Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-35389226667074784602015-11-11T14:21:00.000-05:002016-08-31T17:01:14.113-04:00Poem: By Strands of HairI do not take often to writing poetry and presenting it in public, as I often find that reaction to it is so varied. I even once heard a poet say that "nobody could criticize her poetry because it was hers", to which I say "then keep it to yourself." The moment you put something out into the world, it is no longer just yours, but is open to interpretation and criticism by the audience-at-large. That's the cost of trying to live off your creativity, and anyone who tells you otherwise is a fool. But back to poetry...<br />
<br />
I wrote this in a free form style (as the only other style I am actually good at Sonnets in the form of Shakespeare, and mine are horrible.) The inspiration came to me one night in a hot bath I had drawn after painting along to Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds by the Beatles. I used a bath wash that dyed the water a lovely shade of rose which put everything floating within it (including myself) in stark definition. One of my fiance's hair strands came floating along and from that was born this poem. It follows a 4,4,4,5 count by word, which I came up with during the same bath. The last stanza reverses it and follows a 5,4,5,4 count, again by word. Again, forgive me if this is awful.<br />
<br />
<br />
<h3>
<i>"By Strands of Hair" by Jay Requard</i></h3>
<br />
<br />
<b>By strands of hair</b><br />
<b>love found itself born,</b><br />
<b>mixed by fiery water,</b><br />
<b>a spirit of past aeons.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>By strands of hair</b><br />
<b>therein found whole redemption,</b><br />
<b>the weight washed away,</b><br />
<b>a spirit laid to rest.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>By strands of hair</b><br />
<b>cities would burn ashen,</b><br />
<b>blood would flow unhindered,</b><br />
<b>a spirit of wrath enthroned.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Yet by strands of hair,</b><br />
<b>the spirit chose otherwise.</b><br />
<b>By strands of her hair,</b><br />
<b>the spirit never faltered.</b><br />
<br />
<br />
If you wish to let me know that you like this poem, you hate it, or if you have constructive criticism which *can* equal "stop writing poems", let me know below. Hope you are all doing well and see you soon!Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-71059277774240555402015-11-03T07:29:00.002-05:002017-11-01T06:47:26.665-04:00Why I'm not a fan of NaNoWriMo (And how YOU can succeed at it)I'll be honest, there's no national novel writing month for me, mainly because I write everyday unless I have a reason not to, which even this is suspect because what excuses can you make NOT to do a job you love? Even so, every November comes the flood of posts, the good intentions, and the massive cottage industry that seeks to exploit those who take part. I could gripe about this for an entire blogpost, but instead of griping, I should be helping. So let me state some things clearly before I begin.<br />
<br />
NaNoWriMo in itself is not a problem. The idea that you dedicate yourself to writing 50,000 words over the month of November is a great goal, even though it is often presented in an incredibly obtuse manner that doesn't really help those who try, especially those who have never done it before. <br />
<br />
Here's why I say that: I have written, to date, seventeen different novels, having only completed six of them, and having only sold one that didn't even make it to print at a very tiny press. I started writing in earnest when I was 19, and the average time it takes me to really put out a novel-length manuscript that I'm willing to put my name on is six months to a year--and that is only on the rough draft. The drafts that follow it will take as long as they need to take. Some have taken six weeks. Others, three years. Part of this is because I try to work on three to five different manuscripts at once, but that's me, and I'm getting help for it!<br />
<br />
Novel writing is not easy in any sense of the word, so the idea that someone like me, who has sold stories and written novel-length manuscripts before, looks at NaNoWriMo with a bit of trepidation should be telling. But I've seen how the sausage is made, which also means I can imagine someone else sitting down, never written anything ever before, and seeing something else that is completely different--and I don't want to downplay that. I know people put a lot of love into their work this month, and that should be celebrated. But remember:<br />
<br />
<u><span style="font-size: large;">The only pat on the back you deserve is the one you get when you sign that publishing contract and sell that work.</span></u><br />
<br />
With that said, I could be a fan of NaNoWriMo and its output if it was presented in a realistic, meaningful way that helps instead of pressures. There is a way of doing this that helps new writers learn the craft, helps experienced writers edit their work, and helps those who are already prepared to create the manuscript they will one day send out to publishers/agents/alpha-beta readers. This will be my attempt to provide that path with these five tips for making NaNoWriMo work.<br />
<br />
<h2>
<u>Jay's Five Tips for succeeding at NaNoWriMo</u></h2>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">
1. Outline</span></h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
There are two concrete ways of going about writing your manuscript, though you can usually play between them. The first is "Pantsing", where you essentially write your story as it comes to you, with no planning whatsoever, until you reach THE END. That works for some people, and for short stories, it is usually a doable model. 50,000 words, however, is a completely different beast. A lot can happen in those words, so it often important to "Outline", and thankfully there are a lot of great outlines and methodologies available on the internet to help get you started. At the very least, you should know four things:<br />
<br />
A) Your Beginning - Where does your story start? (Characters, setting, problem, plot)<br />
<br />
B) Your Middle - Where are we when the reader hits your story at its dead center? (Character growth, resetting the board, new problems, fresh solutions)</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
C) Your End - Where does the story end? (Resolution, Growth achievement, Landing, Seeding the next book if there is one...)</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
D) Your Climax - What is the big thing that happens before THE END that ties it all together?</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Knowing these four points, at the very least, gives you a road map where to go, even if you are pantsing it. Knowing where you are going gives you time to formulate how your scenes will play out, how you will sequence events, characters arcs, etc. This leads us to...</div>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">
2. Word count</span></h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Let's do the math: 50,000 words/30 days in November equals 1,666 words a day. For new writers, that can be daunting, but the fact that you're attempting NaNoWriMo is daunting in the first place. With those considerations, I would suggest that everyone employ Stephen King's Word Count "rule" that he enumerates better than I will within his memoir, <i>On Writing</i>.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Hit 2,000 words a day.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i>Yes. That many. </i>By shooting for that number, you can realistically hit the magic 50,000 words, even if you have to miss a few days, which you will, because...</div>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">
3. Hitting 50,000 words is not the point. Getting writing done is.</span></h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I see every year people lament and complain that they didn't hit 50,000 words for the month, but if 50,000 is the point of this month in the first place, stop. Word counts don't equal publishing contracts, and neither does bitching about the fact that you couldn't hit some arbitrary number that nobody is ever going to get mad at you over for not hitting. Things WILL get in the way that may cause you to not reach 50,000 words--work, school, kids, drugs, the apocalypse, <a href="http://johnhartness.com/" target="_blank">John Hartness</a>--anything and everything can and will stop you.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
And that's fine!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Great writing is not made on an assembly line or on schedule. Great writing is made through dedication, time, work, destroying your own ego for the sake of your story, and revising again and again and again until the manuscript is sold. NaNoWriMo is the opportunity to get started, because there is often one thing that people forget: there are not a lot of traditional or small press publishers out there that are taking 50k manuscripts who are going to get you into a bookstore. And that shouldn't be your goal this month. The real goal is much more simple.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">
4. Focus on writing a great rough draft.</span></h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Depending on the genre your write in and the path to publishing you want to take, having 50,000 words at the end of November may only get you so far. <a href="https://worddreams.wordpress.com/2010/12/08/word-count-by-genre/" target="_blank">In some genres, it won't get you anywhere.</a> Now, if you are self-publishing your NaNo project, none of this really applies to you, and I wish you nothing but the best. However, if I was a publisher or an agent and I received a query letter that said "this is the manuscript I wrote for NaNoWriMo, and I am submitting it to you" and that query letter is dated on December 1st, good bloody luck!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Take this time to write the best story you can. NaNoWriMo should be about the process, not just the completion, and if you are writing in a genre that often requires more than 50,000 words for acceptance, you owe to yourself to give you a break from any sort of pressure that writers who partake in this month usually put themselves under. There has only ever been one author that I have known who set out to write a complete novel during NaNoWriMo, and <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Maxey" target="_blank">he's a North Carolina Laureate</a>. I'm guessing those reading this are not him, and neither am I, so why pressure yourself into doing something that results in work that is not your best?</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
The words will show you how important it is to just to take your time. Make this the best rough draft you can.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">
5. Commit</span></h3>
<div>
<br />
Here's where the real pressure is: 1,666 to 2,000 words. For some, that is a steep mountain to climb every day, while for others, it is a walk in the park. Speaking for myself, I usually hit an average of 1700-2000, but that took YEARS to get to. Just like climbing a real mountain, you have to train for it.<br />
<br />
<u>Allow me to repeat myself: you don't have to hit 50,000 words by November 30th.</u><br />
<br />
You do, however, have to sit down and write everyday. You will lose sleep. You won't be able to go out for drinks with your friends. You might not be able to watch your favorite show on Wednesday night. That's because your butt needs to be in a chair, in front of whatever you use to write on.<br />
<br />
Set goals on word counts. Follow your outlines. And remember--this isn't about the word count, it is about the creative process of writing. Enjoy what you are doing. That is what this month should be about: enjoying the process of writing fiction and getting it done.<br />
<br />
<br />
Now go to work, stay safe, and if you have any gripes with what I have said here, I'd be happy to hear from you in the comments below. Bye now!</div>
Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-12466705637172536572014-04-23T16:01:00.004-04:002014-04-23T16:01:51.350-04:00Romance and AgencyOne of the big "debates" in Science Fiction and Fantasy right now is the question of women and the role they play in the genres we all love. Some have erroneously gone out and proclaimed that women authors are "killing" genres, which is kind of bullshit when you consider the fact that it would mean that Ursula K. Le Guin, Mary Shelley, Patricia McKillip, Karen Lord, K.V. Johansen, and an outstanding mix of old and new women authors have done so much to keep the money flowing into publisher's pockets, which keeps the genre going. There really aren't "male authors" or "female authors." Just great authors.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.theamericanmag.com/uploaded_images/article_3002_K0tS.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://www.theamericanmag.com/uploaded_images/article_3002_K0tS.jpg" height="204" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Mary only invented Science Fiction and Horror. But what does she really know?</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div>
And before anyone asks: I am not a feminist due to the fact I am a humanist, simply because I think humanism encompasses all the things that feminism wants without all the political bullshit and gender-divisive language. I am a big fan of Judith Butler and Naomi Wolf though, so I do understand and support the goals and aims of the movement, as long as it is is for true equality and the realization of human dignity outside of gender, race, creed, and whatever else.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/969/vlcsnap2010013021h16m01.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/969/vlcsnap2010013021h16m01.png" height="172" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Seriously, cut that intolerant shit out.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div>
But enough of that! Politics always sours a good table of friends.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
What I wanted to talk about this time revolves around is the question of "Romantic Interests," because one thing that women readers and women writers often bring up is how female characters are relegated to being love interests. And it's true, speaking from person experience. Nine out of ten books I read within fantasy feature women who are treated as some sort of prize to be won by the hero.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So let's get some things out of the way. Nobody should be a "prize." When you get turned into an object instead of a person (which I think defines "objectification"), there is something being taken away from that person, which adds the nasty quality of "subjectification." What is being taken away is their right to be something unto themselves.</div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
But is having a love interests a bad thing then? It depends.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
At the crux of this argument I am about to make is that it all comes down to Agency.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
What is Agency? It is not just something important for female characters, but for male characters, gay characters, black, brown, white, red, and green characters too. Agency is the ability for characters to act independently and make their own free choices.<br />
<br />
Let's look a pair of examples of characters with agency and another pair without agency before we talk about its implications of how this fits into writing a relationship between two romantic leads, because the implications are where things might get contentious.<br />
<br />
Please understand, everything below is my opinion alone.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>Characters with Agency</u></span></div>
<br />
<u>Example #1</u><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.cinemablend.com/images/news_img/39095/Crouching_Tiger_39095.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://www.cinemablend.com/images/news_img/39095/Crouching_Tiger_39095.jpg" height="180" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">All rights go to CinemaBlend for the image.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br />
Jen Yu from <i>Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon </i>is one my favorite characters from one of the best (yet still universally underrated) films in international cinema. Played masterfully by Zhang Ziyi, she is a character that is all about her agency. Instead of being the kind of mewing princess that dreams of holding a sword and going off on adventures, she actually goes and does it throughout the entire movie without having to rely on someone else to do it for her or show her the way. From her choice to study Wudang in secret to deciding that her arranged marriage isn't for her, her willingness to give up her easy life for more than just love alone throughout the story demonstrates for the viewer quite clearly that she is a master of herself and her fate. That is agency in a nutshell. It isn't just that she decides to be a "kick-ass female," it is that she <i>decides on her own to be a kick-ass female.</i></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<u>Example #2</u></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<u><br /></u></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://wulfgar.antredefer.fr/img/wulfgar.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://wulfgar.antredefer.fr/img/wulfgar.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">All rights to R.A. Salvatore and The Forgotten Realms</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<u><br /></u></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
One of my absolute favorite characters from the menagerie of R.A. Salvatore's Drizzt novels, Wulfgar of Icewind Dale was more than the average Thor/Conan stand-in that often overburdened any D&D property. Salvatore's books have been a high mark for a company that often executes before it really thinks. While all of Salvatore's characters get their time to shine throughout the twenty-plus book series, Wulfgar stands out to me as a realistic depiction to the torments of being a real hero. Raised by a dwarf-king and trained by a dark elf, Wulfgar has both the ability see outside of his native people's worldview, and at the same time, form it in a way that it fits within his as well. From deciding not to marry "the girl" and marrying the one he actually loved to giving up his rightfully-earned crown as King of Settlestone, he forged his own path based on what he felt and needed, not what others expected of him because of the typical tropes that usually come with this type of character. He took actual responsibility for the consequences of his actions. This is a marked difference from other warriors I often see in the genre, who are either drones for a higher power or people that just want to work within the system they operate in with little thought to why they do it. Having agency means having the ability to go outside the accepted notions of how people think "the story should go", and Wulfgar does that.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br />
Now, let's look at<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>Characters *without* Agency</u></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><u><br /></u></span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<u>Example #1</u></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/81/b0/13/81b0131aac0616a661112e95eebd734b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/81/b0/13/81b0131aac0616a661112e95eebd734b.jpg" height="320" width="215" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991)</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br />
Please note, I am not picking on the character of Maid Marian herself, as there are a lot of great examples of her being a character with agency; in fact, Cate Blanchett playing the role is a perfect example of a character that could have topped the previous section. However, Maid Marian in <i>Prince of Thieves </i>is a pro-typical damsel in distress that feminists like Anita Sarkeesian point to when they talk about this kind of subject, even though Anita is equally full of shit (another topic for another blog, though, get back to the topic, Jay!) The problem here is that Marian throughout this version of the Robin Hood story is always having things done to her. Robin of Locksley returns to England, she falls in love on first sight. The Sheriff of Nottingham (played by the brilliant Alan Rickman) kidnaps her after trying to force her into a bogus wedding and tries to rape her, requiring her to be rescued by Robin because dammit, that is what needs to happen to get us to the climax of the story. She's a pretty set piece meant to motivate the protagonist to action and little more. She's a <i>prize </i>both sexually and in a proprietary sense<i>, </i>and prizes don't have their own agency if they are only allowed to be won. This is why <i>Robin Hood: Men in Tights</i> is so damned hilarious when they tackled this very issue.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<u>Example #2</u></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<u><br /></u></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.awesomestories.com/images/user/5e7e21ac7b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://www.awesomestories.com/images/user/5e7e21ac7b.jpg" height="320" width="208" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You know who this is? The best actress in that movie.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br />
So this pick is probably going to earn me a lot of heat, but bear with me. Everyone loves Rue, but at the end of the day, she is one of the many characters in <i>The Hunger Games</i> that does not have an ounce of agency. Let's be honest: Rue is there to get jacked (killed) for the sake of Katniss Everdeen's plot, and if we go by the strictest definition of agency, then she is a character without it from the get-go.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
This gets to an important point of characters and agency in the first place: not all of them are going to have it, nor do they all of them <i>need </i>it. The moment any author decides to harm, kill, alter, or change a character for the sake of of another character's plot, that character loses their agency and becomes a set piece.<br />
<br />
This leads to the overall discussion of how Agency and Romantic Relationships interplay with each other, especially in stories where one of the characters in the relationship most likely won't be a point-of-view character. Let's look at two more examples of relationships with agency that only have one point of view in the relationship, and then let's look at one where there isn't any agency present.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<u><span style="font-size: large;">Relationship with Agency</span></u></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<u><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></u></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://c2.staticflickr.com/4/3164/3364671349_57bcd124bb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://c2.staticflickr.com/4/3164/3364671349_57bcd124bb.jpg" width="215" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Croaker and The Lady, Glen Cook</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: left;">
***SPOILERS in this section***</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Full disclosure, I have to admit my bias for this relationship as it is my favorite in all of fantasy. Croaker is the medic and keeper of the annals for The Black Company, a elite force of mercenaries that often hire their services out to the worst of the worst. The Lady is an all-powerful sorceress that rules over half the world, which she took from her husband, The Dominator. Slap these two together from book one, and you have one of the most unforgettable, awkwardly romantic, and organic relationships in one of fantasy' more under-appreciated works. The Lady is always in the seat of power next to our lowly medic, but these two develop an attraction that turns into friendship, and friendship into a love that lasts beyond the most difficult of travails. Yet what makes them work so well is that each is independent of the other, with one neither defining themselves on the basis of the other when it comes to their own self-worth. When Croaker is thought dead and gone from the result of a battle, The Lady steps up as the Company's new leader to take care of herself and the survivors, just like when Croaker finds out The Lady is potentially in huge trouble, he doesn't dash off to save her, knowing she has more than enough ability to handle herself. What makes these characters work so well together is their individual agency and how it interacts within the relationship. When they need each other, they are there, but when they can't be there, they don't just sit their thinking "Oh, what is he/she doing? What am I going to do? I MISS THEM SO MUCH I NEED THEM HERE RIGHT NOW!" It is a relationship that befits any strong couple: one of trust and honesty, not sycophantic reliance on one person.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
They are a TEAM.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Now let's look at a</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<u><span style="font-size: large;">Relationship *without* Agency</span></u></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://fultontest.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/buttercup-and-westley.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://fultontest.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/buttercup-and-westley.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yep, I'm going there.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Once again, I am not bashing the film. In fact, I love this movie! But this movie features a romantic duo that is the exact opposite of Croaker and The Lady. Buttercup, from the get-go, is a blonde Maid Marian, meant to stand there, pout, look pretty, and smile and kiss Wesley on cue. Now, I know what many are going to say: <u>That was the point.</u> The entire movie/novel is meant to satirize the princess genre completely, but they do it so well that it popped into my mind pretty much immediately. Buttercup's entire world is built on two things: 1. I love Wesley and 2. Is Wesley coming for me? Every action she has is at the behest of him, but let's not let Wesley off the hook, either. His entire character is about finding Buttercup and literally giving her whatever she wants, no questions asked, so everything I can say about her should be applied to him as well.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Like Lady and Croaker, who are a TEAM, this is DEPENDENCY.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
And there is a crux of writing a Romantic Relationship with Agency involved:</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
TEAM vs. DEPENDENCY</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Here is an easy guide to know the difference:</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Does your romantic relationship feature two characters working in team, who make independent decisions for themselves outside of the relationship and can still be in a relationship?</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Then YES, they have agency.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Does your romantic relationship feature two characters where one is dependent on the other for everything, who's role and function is dependent on serving the other person's story line or identity?</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Then NO, they do not have agency.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
It is pretty simple when you get down to it, but again, just because a character or a pair of characters do not possess agency doesn't mean they are automatically bad. Sansa Stark from Game of Thrones is distinct for the fact that she has no agency but is still compelling as a viewing glass into the workings of Westeros. She is our witness. As is Gollum from Lord of the Rings, who is meant to represent the corruption the One Ring brings upon all those who wear it. <u>As with everything in writing, it all comes down to how your write it.</u> Be thoughtful about what and who are you putting the page, and put real thought into how you want them represented. You will never please everyone, but a well-written character will always please more people than not.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Thanks for dropping by! If you liked what you read here, please click on the G+1 button the left side of the screen, or follow me on Twitter @JayRequard. Both help me grow the readership for this blog, and any help would be, well, helpful!</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4544085749326250138.post-2851399040816884952013-03-15T14:49:00.003-04:002017-04-12T17:41:30.624-04:00Dealing with Critiques and RejectionNow some people are probably doing a double-take when they read this opening statement, as it goes against many natural inclinations we as writers and human beings have.<br />
<br />
Bear with me:<br />
<br />
<b>Critique and rejection are two of the greatest things that can happen to a writer, but they are only good for a writer if the writer themselves can see critiques and rejections for what they are: the chance to learn.</b><br />
<br />
Nobody in the publishing business does it on their own, and nobody becomes a great writer by themselves. Writing fiction, in its most pure essence, is creating something new and beautiful from one's experiences, hopes, dreams, nightmares, as well as our lowest and highest natures. The type of writing a person does on a creative level defines them in all ways--therefore it makes total sense that having a your work critiqued as anything less than *perfect* or having that work rejected by a publisher hurts. To those with the wrong mindset, such a judgment or rejection isn't just about your characters or your story--it's about you as a person.<br />
<br />
But, my friends, it is good to be rejected as a writer.<br />
<br />
Rejection, especially from a good editor, is more affirming of where you need to go with your writing than it is about how developed you are or aren't as a writer.<br />
<br />
Case in point: I am currently working on a story that was entitled <i>Shallow Bay</i>, which has now been reworked into the <i>The Beast of Shallow Bay. </i>This fantasy epic tells the tale of an old pirate named Ngala who sets sail upon The Mirror Sea on the quest for riches and rapine. On the way back from a successful raid, his ship <i>The Lion</i> is mysteriously trapped in the middle of Shallow Bay, with its deserted coast and the brooding jungles beyond the white sand shore. Trapped without fresh food, water, and harangued by the monsters of the deep, Ngala and crew must solve the mystery of their entrapment before it is too late.<br />
<br />
This story was rejected five times, each by a SFWA pro-market. And yes, it hurt. I won't lie and say that I am not immune to being told that I was lacking, but when I finally got through that one-hour "moody"-period I always go through, I sat back down and really looked at the comments given to me. Out of all the people who rejected it, <i><a href="http://www.beneath-ceaseless-skies.com/" target="_blank">Beneath Ceaseless Skies</a></i>, edited by the talented Scott H. Andrews, gave me the reasons why it was rejected.<br />
<br />
First, the fact that I got a personalized rejection that was not a form letter was a big deal to me, because BCS could have just sent me a form letter and that would have been it. Instead, they told me what the problems were with the story.<br />
<br />
And they were right on about everything they said.<br />
<br />
I went back and found the section where there were pronoun errors, which my critiquers had missed, my first reader had missed, and more importantly, I had missed. In the end, the fault lay squarely upon me. So I sat on it a couple of months, and now I am editing to send back out. I can't send it to <i>Beneath Ceaseless Skies </i>again, but that publication will be one of the big reasons for why it gets picked up when it gets picked up for publication.<br />
<br />
What those who are not as savvy to publishing have to understand--a lot of these publishers and magazines don't have a lot of money, so the spots that they can give out in their publications are limited, and believe it or not they do receive a lot of good stories. This forces them to have to look at every single detail and mistake and weigh it against other submissions, a process that is completely out of the hands of those submitting to them. It is part of the learning process of trying to get into this business and produce great fiction.<br />
<br />
It is understandable to be angry when your work is rejected, but a real writer can't let that anger stop them from moving on and trying again. It may be an old axiom, but the ones who make it in publishing are the ones who try, try, try, and try again. Rowling was rejected hundreds of times before Harry Potter was published. George R.R. Martin was rejected 45 times before he even sold his first short story.<br />
<br />
Don't give up. Toughen that "author's skin", remove yourself from the emotional side of it, and learn how to sit down and pick your work apart so it can become better.<br />
<br />
This somewhat segue-ways into the area of critiques. Critiques aren't rejections, but in some cases they can feel as damaging to a writer as if they were actual rejections. This fact is compounded by the reality that quality critiques are hard to receive because depending on who you are working with the people around you may not have a good grasp of your genre or they may be starting out on their journey as a writer and really don't know a lot about writing fiction. <br />
<br />
Sometimes it is hard to know which critiques are good for your work and which ones are might not apply. However, we can pay some attention to what makes a good critiquer over a good critique. Here are the seven aspects I look for in a good critiquer.<br />
<br />
<h3>
<u>What Makes A Good Critiquer</u></h3>
<br />
1. A good critiquer is reader who reads your work critically and makes constructive suggestions to make the piece better while at the same time respecting the fact that it is your work.<br />
<br />
2. A good critiquer does not try to rewrite or redefine your work to suit their tastes, as it is your work and not theirs.<br />
<br />
3. A good critiquer comes prepared to critique.<br />
<br />
4. A good critiquer remains professional and treats what they are doing as a job. <b>Remember, the goal is to get your work ready to be published, and publishing is a business.</b><br />
<br />
5. A critiquer never talks poorly of other writers or refuses to critique based on their opinion of other's skills. A critiquer is there to learn and to help others learn the Craft of Writing, and should come into a critique session with a positive and helpful attitude.<br />
<br />
6. A good critiquer is constantly trying to improve their own skills as a writer, editor, and reader.<br />
<br />
It goes without saying that not all critiques are equal in value, so therefore it is the job of the person being critiqued to unpack all of the opinions they are given and decide which ones provide the most value for getting their work toward publication. This takes a lot of time working in dedicated critique groups, building an honest rapport with its members, which sometimes means swallowing your ego and taking the time to listen to what your peers are saying.<br />
<br />
In closing I would like to add one final reminder: sometimes hearing a "no" in publishing is the first step to hearing a "yes" that lets you into the industry. Try, try, and try again, my friends, and one day that "yes" will come.<br />
<br />
If you enjoyed this blog article please do me the kind service of pressing on the "G+1" button at the top right of the screen, or follow me on Twitter <a href="http://twitter.com/JayRequard" target="_blank">@JayRequard</a>. Thanks for visiting!<br />
<br />Jay Requardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07592797890723159522noreply@blogger.com1